Jesus the Marriage Therapist–Matthew 19

MATTHEW 19:1-15


Marriage, marriage is what brings us together today. As the subject of marriage is brought before Jesus, it is interesting to note that “large crowds followed him, and he healed them.” Jesus offers healing for our marriages. Lets see what he has to say.


The Pharisees, trying to trap Jesus, ask, “is it lawful to divorce your wife for just any reason?” Jesus responds by reminding us all just how strong the marriage bond is designed to be.

Marriage is built in to our design at creation–19:4

Marriage is built to make a new family–19:5
J.W. McGarvey said, “The relation to father and mother can be dissolved only by death, yet the marriage relation is more intimate than that, and its obligations are more binding.”

Marriage is built to make 1 flesh out of two–19:6
We have seen the difficulty of separating conjoined twins. This procedure is even more difficult when these twins share vital organs. The separation of a married couple should be no less difficult seeing they are joined by God at the heart.

Marriage is built by God himself–19:6
Hebrews 13:4, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”

Divorce is a common problem in our age and it was in the 1st century as well. If marriage is so strong, the Pharisees asked, “why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” Jesus says that there are some things that will be enemies to your marriage, and we must guard ourselves against them.

Public enemy number 1–“the hardness of your heart”
1 John 4:19, “We love because he first loved us.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” 1 Corinthians 13:13, “So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three: but the greatest of these is love.”
“The withholding of love is the negation of the spirit of Christ” (Batsel Barrette Baxter “The Analysis of Love”). We are to have the personality of Christ. The Bible says, “For whom he foreknew, he also foreordained to be conformed to the image of His Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren” (Romans 8:29).

Public enemy number 2–“sexual immorality”
Trust is the avenue to love

The song to preserve your marriage.
“Have Thine Own Way Lord, Have Thine Own Way”

Jesus agrees that his law for marriage is a difficult one to carry out. But he challenges us to meet the test. Jesus says that marriage is only for those who are willing to live up to these standards.
It is a challenge to do greater, not permission to do worse.

Not everyone can receive this saying–marriage isn’t for everyone.
Some refrain from marriage for physical reasons, social reasons, and spiritual reasons.
Some choose to take the path of marriage.

There are no coincidences in the way the Scriptures are arranged. Matthew began this discussion on marriage with Jesus healing (from the word for “therapy”) the crowds. After the discussion on marriage we see Jesus say, “Let the little children come to me and od not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God” (Matthew 19:14).
We need Jesus marriage therapy. We need to run to him as little children would run to their parents. We also need to consider our children as we maintain our marriage

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